I’m worried about Paris. I’m a nutritionist by trade, and a huge PH fan, and I feel I’m just sitting idly by while my idol half starves to death in a gulag. It is unbelievable that such cruelty and injustice is occurring right here on American soil. Both my brothers are in the Armed Forces, fighting in the war on terror. Is this the kind of freedom they’re fighting for? I think not.

Paris was always a beanpole and now from what I’ve been able to piece together online, she’s dropping weight like no tomorrow. A lot of bloggers are saying that Paris at first refused to even look at the prison menu. I say good for her! But eventually I guess, even the mighty Paris had to eat something.

Reportedly meals in her jail are served only twice in any twenty-four hour period. The most common meal is the prison-issue ham sandwich. Any PH fan knows she can’t stand ham sandwiches, and considers folks who eat them “low class.” I couldn’t agree more. I hope she gets more vegie meals, and maybe some whey to bulk up in there.

In 1973, at the height of Nixon’s Watergate scandal, Ted Kennedy actually had the nerve to scream from the Senate floor, “Do we operate under a system of equal justice under law? Or is there one system for the average citizen and another for the high and mighty?”

Experts believe that Mary Jo Kopechne spent two nightmarish hours in an air pocket in the upside down car.

This has been your Irony of the Day.